The Head Guards New Clothes

Bandit just can't get a break... Made some minor edits to the log for various reasons.

The sun shines brightly through the lightly clouded sky this morning. The forest around the pathway provides shade to keep its travelers cool. Among them is a single brown furred fox. Having lingered about the abbey for a few days after its latest feast Bandit stopped by the local woodland market place before heading back for Ferreval for good. It was high time the fox got some new garments, especially after a few days of redwall feasting.

The portly vulpine is now wearing a black tunic with a flashy red vest and dark red trousers. He is quite impressed with his bargan buy and quite proud to look like a decent, civilized beast for once, not some mangy woodland fox, but a true guard captain.

He is so impressed with his find that he infact, never see's Vannon coming. The scrawny little grey fox pokes his head up over a bush, watching the fat head guard walk by. He slinks out onto the road with a sly smile then knocks his fellow vulpine over the head with a blackjack. Vannon catches Bandit as he falls towards him, then grunts with effort as he pulls Bandit off to the side of the road behind several bushes.

A short while later Vannon appears sporting a new red vest, black tunic, and dark red trousers. They hang off of him like a tent, "Eh...I can get it tailored." The fox shrugs then walks further down the roadway leaving Bandit laying on the side of the road behind some bushes wearing only his fur and a pair of tan shorts.

Aibne is by the road and risesan eyebrow when he sees Vannon and narrows his eyes as he pulls out a sling shot and loads a rock onto it and starts swinging. To him this is a vermin and he is no friend to one of them, he lets the rock fly towards the fox in hopes it connects somewhere.

The slender grey fox lets out the most horrid yelp and jumps strait into the air, both paws clutching at his rump. He lands on all fours and twists his head about in all directions until his eyes lock onto the otter down the road behind him. "You little punk! What do you think you are doing?" The fox flails his arms about as he shouts across the road. He begins to move closer, shaking an angry paw at him, "Where do you get off tossin rocks at me you jerkwagon! What's the big idea? You like just tossing stones at random beasts? Huh? Do yah?" He shuffles forward, kicking up dirt as he does.

Aibne narrows his eyes and selects another rock and starts spinning it as he answers, "Your a vermin, that's why and less vermin in the world be fine with me."

It is then that a stocky figure appears from the cover of the trees, that of a sturdily-built otter, dressed as though for travelling. Or boxing. Or boxing while travelling. She looks sideways at the /Oceana-Lutra/ holding the sling, but doesn't make any physical attempt to stop him, yet. "I can't let you do that, sonny." she says, wrapped paws folded.

I"Of all the...self centered...purist...speciest..." The fox's words trail off as he realizes that he is unarmed, repetitively speaking. Nature did provide the fox with claws and teeth but those do little good to a miniature catapult in training. In the right paws a sling could break wood, and Vannon was practically at point blank range. It is then that the second otter makes her appearance. The fox let's his heart sink, he is about to be mugged by woodlanders! Oh the irony!

Her words fill him with hope though, "Yes! What she said! Help! Help! This crazy person is trying mug me! Or rob me! Or make me into stew! Help!" He shouts, slowly shuffling away from both otters.

Aibne smirks "Why would I waste my time on vermin scum to rob them, or eat thats worse." He looks over at the other otter, "Oh, well if you want to fight him by all means ya can and I will watch."

Haven just raises her eyebrow a little, looking from otter to fox as it would appear that, for the moment at least, she has managed to disuade Aibne from committing a little bit of murder. She points at Vannon. "/You/ need to give that other fox his clothes back." she says in short order, with a knowing look. Yep. She saw.

Oh blast, she saw. The grey furred vannon laughed nervously at the tree otter. Rubbing his arm he gulps and replies, "I...I don't know what you're talking about. I..." And with out much flair he turns and bolts off down the road, heading north, panting and gasping and yelping as he flees for his very life.

Meanwhile Bandit stirs from his blackjack induced slumber. He groans loudly and rolls onto his side before falling back onto the ground with a splitting head ache.

Aibne blinks "I say kill the fox, don't think he will simply give back clothing and whats it matter. He's a fox"

Haven seems to consider pursuing the fleeing fox, but clearly decides against it. She does have a slight look of reluctance about her decision though as she replies to the other otter, "If he was that desperate for just some clothes, maybe he deserves the benefit of the doubt this time." She peers into the bushes a- whooooa. Naked fox. "...'Ello."

As his fellow vulpine makes a mad dash down the road Bandit wakes up, He sits up rubbing the back of his head, "Did someone get the number off of that cart?" He leans forward. He looks over his foxly form and is most surprised to see that he is laying here in naught but his natural fur coat and his under garments. And in the pressence of an otter. Forgetting the pain i nthe back of his head Bandit's cheeks turn impossibly red. He lets out a loud yipe and throws himself further into the bushes with his tail wrapped about himself, "What in the blazes is happening? Why did you steal my clothes you crazy otter!"

the sea otter decides to just leave, tehy want foxes tostay alive what ever to him he has to find someone and just walks off.

Haven shrugs to herself regarding the other otter's sudden departure, and leaves for a moment. She soon returns with her pack which, luckily for the fox, has a heavy sack of feathers she uses as a punchbag while training. Emptying the feathers into her pack, she throws him the resulting makeshift cloak. "Don't look at me, I tried to get 'em back." she explains.

The fox gratefully takes the makeshift cloak, wrapping it around himself and his shorts. Even then the fox doesn't step out from the bushes. "You did? I mean, you did?! What did the little rascal who robbed me look-" He growls, rubbing at his head, "Blast it, what did the little thief look like."

Haven shrugs some. "Well, not to sound specist, but sort of like you, mostly." she says, hefting her big pack onto her back with ease. "Less well-presented though. Than you were before, I mean." snort

The fox groans as he beats his head against the tree. "Ah blazes...bleeding blazes and more blazes..." Bleeding Redwall. His life among the abbey dwellers has censored most of his more colorful expressions learned from his sea faring days. "I'll catch up to him later...little rascal took my coin purse and..." The fox took his back pack as well, the pack with a short sword tucked into it and his guard uniform.

More head beating against the tree ensues, "Ah heck...that little monster has my guard uniform...and all my money."

Haven raises that eyebrow once more. "Money? Who uses that around here...? Oh, you must be from one of those cities I've heard about." She says, frowning. "I wouldn't hit the tree like that, you're probably already concussed."

"It's a whole lot better than what I will be if that fox uses my uniform somewhere in Ferrival, let me tell you that much!" The fox moans loudly. With a resigned sigh the fox steps out from behind the tree, wrapping himself tightly with the cloak. "I'm Bandit, head guard of one of those cities up north, and yes, I'm well aware of the irony." The fox bows slightly then tries to shuffle his way past the otter, "I am much abliged but I need to get back home and let people know that..." that he what? Was robbed? The head guard? That he is traveling with only a cloak on? Oh the humiliation. "This day just keeps getting better.

Haven frowns again. She does feel sorry for the fox despite herself. "Is there anywhere close to here that might afford you some more clothes or such? I'd help, but I only travel light." That huge pack is 'travelling light'?

The fox looks up and down his savior with a raised eyebrow. Well there is Redwall, surely the kind beasts there will lend him aid. And he will never live down the shame afterward. "No...not around here." The fox says quickly. He staggers in place, leaning against the tree to support himself, "Ah blazes, Redwall...Redwall is just south of here blast it..." Shame or no shame, he is not making the mistake of traveling wounded...not again.

Haven nods. "Ah, so you aren't a stranger to that place. Yeah, I suggest you get there, they'll help you out. I can come with you if you like, make sure you're okay." she offers.

Beaten up, robbed, and led to safety by a woodlander woman? Will he have any dignity left after this? Thinking back to all the times he has been found passed out in a food coma at the tavern the fox has to wonder, did he have any dignity to begin with. "Alright...fine." He says in an exasperated tone. "If anyone asks I fought off ten bandits and a badger though...and..." He says in a calmer voice, "Thanks."

Haven smirks at the fox and how he relents in the end. Though she's clearly no ordinary female woodlander. "Don't worry about it. It's what I do." she says, stepping out onto the road.