Bandits Day Off 2, the sad story of Nash the fox

From Redwall MUCK Wiki


Sometime ago.

Nash remembers the day he came into Ferrevale for the first time. It was also the first time he saw snow. He had been woefully unprepared for the bitter cold of the northern lands, at least what HIS people considered the northern lands.

Nash came from the far south, in the waste lands where the tallest trees were mere bushes compared to the forests of Mossflower, a land where it snow was a fabled myth that had not come to his home land in his life time.

The fox shivered and shook, ice hanging from his nose with his tail wrapped tightly about his legs. This was not weather for a beast who wore only a loin cloth and a bead vest!

Stepping out of the sweet shop behind him a tall pine marten cast a quick glance at the fox who was accumulating snow on his head. She looked him up and down. The fox’s brown fur hung loosely upon his bony half-starved body.

The marten grimaced. Somehow tossing a few coins to the fox just, didn’t seem right in this particular situation. “What in the blazes do you think you are doing?”

“I, am w-waiting…f-for summer to roll by.” Nash replied, sneezing as he did.

“How’s that working out for you?”

“It w-w-was w-working better before the shop keepers tossed me out. S-s-something about, no shoes, n-no shirt no service…”

The pine marten rubbed her eyes. “Oi.” Rolling her eyes and shaking her head at the heavens the pine marten stepped forward, thrusting the bags in her arms unto the fox. “What are you doing?” Nash replied.

“Paying you back for carrying my stuff. Now be quite and follow me.” Taking the young tod by the arm she began to lead him away from the bakery. The fox didn’t resist. What was the point? Either he stayed here freezing to death or he obviously didn’t have anything to rob. What else did he have to lose?

The fox ate like a fiend. Even while still chewing a woodpigeon with one hand his free paw was reaching for bread. The marten couldn’t imagine where he managed to keep all the food he ate. Taking a look at his swelling stomach she hazard a guess.

“Easy Nash, why don’t you slow down? If your tummy ruptures then YOU get to clean it up.”

“Oh let the poor beast eat honey. It will make him nice and fat for dinner.”

Nash paused in his gorging to look fearfully at the burly pine marten behind the counter. “Pay no mind to my brain dead husband.” The female marten slugged her husband in the arm. “Landon won’t hurt you and neither will I.”

“Don’t believe her fox, Lori will murder us both if we create a mess in her shop!” Landon chuckled. Nash watched the display with a light hearted but nervous chuckle. He didn’t stop eating but he did slow down a bit.

“Thank you both. I apologize for my rudeness, it’s…been a while since my last meal.” The fox coughed, pulling the blanket over his shoulders tighter around his body. His foot paws sloshed around in a bucket of hot water. “I hope I’m not taking too much from your larder…”

“Nah you’re fine. We had plenty of extra saved up for just an emergency.” Landon waved his paw idling in the air.

“That and we could stand to skip a few meals.” Lori prodded the marten in his side. “In all seriousness we had more woodpigeons than we could sell this year anyway, so better it goes to some beast rather than waste.”

“Why did you collect so many?”

“It’s our business. This is our butcher shop don’tcha know.” Lori chuckles, “Where else do you think the tavern get’s all its chopped meats?”

The fox chuckles, “’fraid I havn’t been to visit the tavern yet.”

“So where HAVE you visited Mr. Nash?” Landon asks, “What brings you up here?”

The fox pauses in eating, turning to the butcher, “I am on a pilgrimage, of sorts. Exploring the northern areas as a rite of passage into man hood.” The lie made the food turn to ash on his tongue. But it wasn’t a true lie he supposed. His tribe did tell him not to come back until he grew up…or learned to stop sneaking into the food store at night…

“Well, I’m afraid you are going to be stuck here for a while. Snows coming down thick. If you don’t have anyone to stay with we can harbor you for the night but after that you’ll need to find somewhere else to earn your keep. We ain’t a charity you know.” Lori said as she pushed another loaf of bread towards the fox.

Nash smiled. He agreed with the proposition but inwardly laughed. Him? A job? Like those frilly puffed up city vermin dashing about the village? Like he would ever do that….

Nash scoops snow into the shovel and tosses it into the street. He takes a moment to wipe his brow of sweat. It was amazing how hot it could get when one was wearing a sweater and trousers. Both once belonged to Landon and fit a little more tightly as time went on. Nash would like to believe that Landon is a smaller beast, but he knows that is not the case. A few weeks of glut did the skinny fox good, perhaps too good. Oh well, thought Nash with a sigh, it was just a little winter fluff. He would slim down once he started traveling again.

The door to the butcher shop opens behind the fox. “Going out for the night I see?”

“You could say that. Here are your wages for the week.” Lori hands the fox a small bag of coins and they quickly disappear into his pocket. “We are going to watch a fight tonight in the tavern. Did you want to come?”

The fox barks out a laugh. Shaking his paw he replies, “No thanks. I got better things to do than spend my time watching beasts get drunk and pass out. I never really cared for the taste of ale either.”

“That’s only because you havn’t found the right ale mate.” Landon grinned evilly. “But oh well. Suit yourself. IF you change your mind you know where to find us.”

“Sure thing, take care.” The fox returns to his duties. Him, in a tavern with all the drunk beasts rooting for people to bludgeon each other into submission? As if that would ever happen….

“Left! Hit him with your left! No you mangy idiot!” Nash pulls at both ears. “For the love of all that is holy, what was THAT? You call that a fight? Get back up on your feet and slug him! In the face! GAAAAH!” The fox turns and barks loudly, storming off from the fighting pits to the tavern bar amid the laughter of his friends.

“Looks like someone was betting on the losing team.” The beasts at the bar laughed.

“I don’t gamble.” The fox said sourly. He leaned his back against the bar, ordering a drink.

“Maybe you should. Might be healthy for you to spend money on something other than food.” The beast prods Nash in the stomach. After several months of visiting the tavern almost daily the fox had gained more than drinking buddies.

Shooing the beast away Nash rubs at the growing paunch on his stomach. The fox’s belly wasn’t the only part of him starting to round out. “I hardly get paid enough as it is to be able to afford to gamble.”

“That’s why you gamble mate!” A less portly red fox wraps his arm around Nash’s shoulders and points to a group of weasels at the back of the bar, “See them? You should go talk wid’ em sometime. I bet you could make a mint with them. Just choose the beast who you think will win, and bet against him! You always seem to choose the loser of each match!”

Nash pushes the fox away. He never said they were GOOD drinking buddies. He rolls his eyes and turns back to his drink. Like he would ever turn to gambling…

“You want WHAT?” Nash seems to shrink as Lori yells.

“It’s not really that much, right? Just a little bit to hold me over. I-“

“Are getting nothing from me.” The marten rounds on the fox, prodding him in the chest, “Nothing. Not a #$@! Penny.”

“B-but Lori. You don’t understand! These beasts are coming to cut my tail off if I can’t pay them back! Tonight!” The fox flails his arms about.

“Good!” Even Landon pauses at the sight of Lori’s anger. “Maybe it will teach you a lesson. Every time you sit down you can be reminded what a fool you are.”

“L-lori…” The fox looked at Lori with wide eyes, giving her a puppy dog look.

“Don’t even try.” The marten hisses. “Out with ye. You heard me. Get out. Get out until you bring back the beast we met two years ago.” She points at the door and the fox’s heart nearly breaks. He turned, shuffling for the door until it’s slammed behind him. Once out of sight Nash the fox sighs. “Ungrateful blighters. After all I did for them!” He storms off and around the side of the building. “Still doesn’t change the fact that I need to get out of here before night fall…” He talks to himself as he fumes. Running is his only option and that, at least tears at his heart. To give up his comfortable life that he had built up, that is hard. The thought of what his debtors would do to him though is quite the incentive. He was never much of a fighting beast even before his health left him.

It was going to be hard, getting used to surviving outside a city again. First thing he will need is supplies. The fox turns towards the butcher shop and rubs his chin. He may be too large to fit through the window, but he knows where Landon keeps the spare key…

Today

Nash let out a belch then picked his teeth clean using the bones of the woodpigeon he ate. Out here by himself the fox has no company to apologize to. Well, maybe the butchers whom he stole the supplies from, but that time had come and gone. Besides, after spending so much time in the city his hunting skills were...lacking.

He would have to settle on trapping, at least until he worked off some pudge. Even if only a little bit. The young fox was struggling not to pant even after a short walk through the woods. He...hasn't gone THAT far from the village, did he? He was planning on resting in the clearing up ahead anyway...

The fox isn't the only beast out tonight. Riana Thunderbolt is out hunting. She usually doesn't hunt this close to a village, but she hasn't had a decent meal for the past 3 days. Every beast that she has hunted has gotten away, except for that scrawny wildcat she caught yesterday. And it as so skinny, it barely qualified as a snack. She eyes the vulpine below and smiles. Perhaps her luck is about to change....

Perhaps Nash's luck was about to change! Stepping out into the clearing the fox pauses at the sight of something odd in front of him. He takes a step back, his gut hanging about his knees as he picks up a blue cloth of some sort. He sets his spear down blade first into the soft earth and examines his find.

It was a tabard! A very finely made one at that. Blue with the Ferrevale signal on it. "Now how did you get out here?" The fox says to himself. It actually looked like a guard uniform. "You know, a halfway decent beast would return this to the beast who lost it." The fox shrugs, tossing the uniform on, "Pity I'm not a halfway decent beast."

After fitting himself into the rather surprisingly loose tabard the fox looks himself over, "Not bad." He picks up his spear and begins to stab at the air, swinging his weapon about and giggling. "I'm Nash the guard captain! Fear my powah!" He chuckles at himself, glad that no one is actually watching him make a fool of himself.

Ah, now that is where he is wrong! Riana Thunderbolt is watching him make an idiot out of himself. She, however, would prefer it if he continues; easier to catch that way, you see. She starts to circle, getting the distance and how much speed she'll need, as well as his fitness level and weapon, fixed into her mind. Hmm....spears are not friendly for birds. She looks for something to use as a shield....ah, there we go! She goes into the forest behind the fox and grabs what is an actual shield, rusty and forgotten-looking. How long it's been there is anyone's guess; it's probably been here for a score of seasons. Clutching it in her talons, she takes off and goes back to circling the fox from the sky. Fortunately for her, the shield is so rusted, it can't reflect any light down to him to alert him of her presence.

The fox laughs at his own foolishness. Shaking his head he sits down on the soft grass and simply, relaxes. It's been so long, so long since he enjoyed walking through the woods. To sit here and watch the clouds go by, to watch the birds of the heavens take flight and circle above him...like a vulture. Resting his paws behind his head the fat bellied thief tilts his head to one side, "Wait...is that..."

Oh, well.....nurts. Riana, with her impeccable eagle sight, can tell that he has spotted her. Shoot. The golden-feathered bird decides to dive NOW! Which she does, shield to the fore, just in case 'Cause you know mammals and their silly pointy weapons, always wanting to protect themselves. When she gets close, she goes to squish him under the shield!!! Unless he runs. Then she'll....make up a Plan B on the fly. Literally and figuratively.

Plan A for Nash is to scream. An eagle. He has only seen a few in his life...from the safety of a hut with the tribe about to protect him.

The fox rolls to his side, scooping up his spear as the eagle lands a moment later. In an instant the fox is on his feet, spear at the ready. He looks up at the eagle, taking her in for all her deadly predatory glory and the only thing he can think to say is, "Cruuuuuuuuuud." He gulps, stepping backward, "S-stay back! I mean it!" He thrusts the spear once or twice in the general direction of the eagle to let it know he means business!

Seriously? Well, at least he didn't run. Riana hefts the shield with one clawed foot, somehow managing to stay balanced on the other as she hops menacingly towards her intended prey. "Or you'll do what, little fox? I am death on the wing. Your end will be much easier and faster if you. stay. still!!" She gives a powerful flap of her wings and lunges forward, aiming to whack the vulpine upside the head with the shield and grab him around his waist with her empty foot.

The fox yelps as the talons brush against his belly, grasping at air. The wings knock him onto his rear and he screams. In blind panic he throws the spear at the bird before rolling onto his feet and running on all fours. Why? Why is the bird trying to kill him? What did he ever do to the bird? Did he owe it money? When he starts to run out of breath so quickly Nash realizes that he has done nothing to the bird other than being a big fat fox.

It wanted to EAT him.

That fact alone causes the fox to run faster, his heart pumping blood to muscles he hasn't used for /seasons/ He has to hide, he has to hide! There! In the woods! He can escape the eagle under the cover of the trees!

"Oh, COME ON!" Riana screeches as, while she ducks out of the way, the spear cuts into her shoulder. As blood trickles into her feathers, her anger begins to build, and she throws the shield away. Okay. This. Means. WAR. Giving a blood-curdling shriek, she flaps her immense wings and gives chase, flying low and giving the occasional short hop-run-thing along the ground.

The fox is barking now, yelping in terror as he dashes across the ground. By the time he reaches the tree line he is panting for breath. He dares to twist around and sees the bird is still hot on his heels. The thought of ending up as a meal for this creature terrifies him. His eyes glance about for safety. Which path through the woods does he take? Does he try to hide?

He spies finally a large tree with a hole at the base. Cackling like a mad beast he runs for the tree. He grips the hole firmly with both paws, pulling himself up. The fox's head and torso slide in and then...stop.

Nash's ears stand strait up as he realizes that he is far too well fed to fit into the tree trunk. That doesn't stop him from trying though.

With the last of his strength he sucks in his gut and pulls.

...

...

It isn't enough.

In the end the fox is only halfway in the tree, feet kicking at open air. "No! No! No! Nononononononono! Gahhh! No!" The fox becomes frantic, clawing, crying, and scraping at the inner tree for traction as tears roll down his cheeks.

Riana glides up and lands at the base of this tree, staring at his kicking feet and presumably bushy tail. "Pathetic...." she goes to grab his ankles and yanks, possessing enough strength to rip him out of the tree, and possessing an understandable lack of empathy for her prey to not care about if some of his hide gets ripped off in the process. If she manages to get him free from the hole, she flips him onto his back and lets him go. Towering over him, even if he's still stuck in the tree, she rumbles, "I warned you, little fox. You shouldn't've run."

The fox let's out a panicked, and pained, yelp. He lands on his back, the air being knocked out of him. His eyes stare up at the creature above him, his bottom jaw quivers in fear. His back still to the earth he tries to scurry away from the eagle, tail tucked between his legs. His mouth opens to plead, possibly beg in a most pathetic manor, but for the life of him he can't utter a single solitary squeak.

Riana goes to slam her taloned foot onto him, aiming to pin him down and hold him still. She leans forward until her beak is inches away from his nose, no yet ready to kill him. She flexes the wing that he injured with his spear, sending a few drops of blood fling towards him. "You see this??" she hisses angrily, her eyes showing just how livid she is. "I should kill you slowly and painfully for that, little fox. Give me a reason to make your death a quick one."

Nash gasps as the foot drives the air from his lungs. He clutches at her talons as they dig into his side, kicking his feet about under the bird. "W-wait! You don't have to do this!" The fox would in all honestly, try to avoid death at all costs, slow or otherwise! His slippery tongue has saved him before though, he can...he can talk his way out of this! The alternative is too grizzly to think about. "S-sure you could eat me here, but then what? You would be hungry again! What if...what if I told you I know where to find meat, lovely wonderful non fox meat! S-s-see I know this butcher shop in town, I can just head back there, grab some stuff, bring it out here and viola! You never have to hunt again! Doesn't that sound nice!?" He nods his head as if the bird should agree with him and not devour him!

"Grrrr.... Riana picks him up and slams him into the ground. "WHAT IS WITH YOU STUPID FOXES AND TRYING TO BECOME MY SLAVES???!!" she shrieks with a painful volume. "How do I know that you will not just leave, little fox, never to be seen again?? I shall kill you and leave your precious hide at the village gates as a warning that I, Riana Thunderbolt, DO NOT TAKE PRISONERS!!!" she slams him into he ground again and shouts in a booming voice, "Any last words, you irritating prey beast?!"

The fox has the wind knocked out of him again. He gasps in pain and whines. So this is it? A life time of adventure, ended by an eagle. What will his last words be? To ask the butchers to forgive him? To say good by to his family? To stretch himself out and let the eagle finish him with honor? Perhaps something profound, something poetic?

"Please doooooon't eat meeeeee-e-e-e!"

Or that.

Riana growls again and tries to say something 3 times. But she can't because she's so furious, so she just opens and closes her beak. Narrowing her eyes, she finally manages to grit out, "Enough of this...." and delivers the death blow.

If this were a story, then something would come to the fox's rescue. Some beast coming out of the woods, or some last minute bit of luck to spare the fox's life.

But this isn't a story.

The fox gasps as the beaks connects with his belly, tearing the fox's middle open like a water melon. A wave of pain flows through Nash's body and his vision begins to fade from shock, from pain, from the knowledge that he is about to make a wonderful meal for the eagle...

Riana shrieks in victory, then begins her grisly feast.

Time Passes.....

Much time.....

Finally, she s finished. sated for the first time in days, she sighs happily and nudges the now-empty fox skin and clothing with her talon. Grabbing them, she lifts into the sky and wings her way to the nearby village....

"Look alive men." Markus barks as he moves back and forth in front of the guard shack. The red fox has his arms folded behind him. "I know some of you have heard a lot of rumors about the guard captain lately. All you need to know is that he is missing, and needs to be found. While we look in the city you are to break into pairs and search for him in the woods."

The guards assembled salute the quartermaster.

"Remember beasts. We MUST find the head guard. No matter how long or how far we have to search!

"You had better." Blisa steps out of the shadows, wearing a black cloak to conceal herself. Ferdinand, Clarissa, and Hank follow her, also wearing dark cloaks. A slight sound on the other side of the street reveals the presence of Basilisk as he glides across the path to join the cat. "I would like to question him /personally/," the petite Chieftan-In-Training continues. "I believe that my bodyguards can be very....persuasive.

"Isn't that right, Basil?" The snake hisses happily as she strokes his neck. "Yesssssss, persssssuassssssive....." Unbeknownst to the mammals (and reptile), Riana Thunderbolt the golden eagle is watching them from high above, waiting for the right moment to drop her 'message'.

Lenore room-pages, "there. now it's done.".

Markus the fox salutes the bows. "Yes ma'am. You can count on us. We WILL find the fox." And drag his fat, traitorous tail back here in chains, thinks Markus. "Ferrivale guards are the best trackers in the land! No stone will be left un turned! No woodland unsearched! No river un...un...well, unsearched either!"

Rolling her jade green eyes, Blisa waves a paw in the air impatiently. "Yeah, yeah, I get the pictur--HOLY CATFISH TAILS!!" she screams as the pelt of Nash and the clothes he was wearing suddenly land in front of her. Basil immediately whisks her up in his coils, and her bodyguards draw their weapons as a terrible eagle shriek resounds out from above them. "I am Riana Thunderbolt, AND I DO NO TAKE PRISONERS, NOR DO I KEEP SLAVES!! THAT IS YOUR ONLY WARNING!!" and then she is gone.

There is series of high pitched and girly screams from the guards as they duck and cover. Markus stands ready to fight, blade half drawn. He sheaths it as he watches the bird fly away. The beast looks up at the bird then at the remains of the poor fox. He cringes, "Shut up Wesly." He snaps at the weasel still screaming in the background. "By the light...is that...is that guard tabard?" His eyes widen. "I know this fox..."

The other guards begin to draw closer. "It can't be...you mean its..."

"But he...he can't..."

"It's Bandit."

The quartermaster removes his own tabard, placing it over the remains of the fox. Thief and scoundrel the head guard may be but the brown fox certainly deserves some measure of dignity. "Well Blisa...It...it seems we found out what happened to Bandit..."